Monday, December 21, 2009

"The Three Joes.. battle begins!"


“ENGINEER”.. the word once pronounced causes intense compressions and rarefactions in the surrounding vibrating medium striking the eardrums of many simultaneously, many who were not even a part of the conversation; and the first thing that a normal person (normality here refers to all those loosers who slipped off the IIT and NIT entrances because they could not manage a few a,b,c,d’s from their neighbors) would imagine in the screen of his grey matter is a “turbine”!. Four years of exile to a forest where all you get to see are different breeds of the same gender longing for salvation (SALVATION!, well that would be an entire new post!) and of course those hypocrites wearing various flavors of Playboy perfumes, the aroma of which are far more worse than the deadliest of Sleeping Pills (Guess what?. I was just referring to the teachers); yet all the Joe gets to learn are the two basic postulates of Biology:

1. Man actually evolved from apes!

2. Man is also an animal!

After two years of intense studying and preparations, the Joe finally manages a rank very near to the margins, and gets his name engraved into the attendance record of some Engineering Institute. Bidding goodbye to the socialised locality which may also sometimes include a girlfriend, the Joe reaches a place called hostel where he is rewarded with some not so familiar faces called roomies and the first thing that reaches his ears is “Dude!. Rubbers are even available in chocolate flavour!” Well the next thing is obviously a slang. Eventually when the Joe attends his first lecture he discovers another interesting fact - that during the Joe’s admission, the college signed a MOU with the UGLIEST FEMALE RIGHTS ASSOCIATION and imported all the “not so beautiful, ('ugly' would be better word)” opposite genders and made them sit beside him. Life for him could never be worse. The Joe could almost hear the director shouting out to the outer world,

“HELLOoooo!. You are so ulgy!.. This year you get a wild card entry into our college!”

Of course the beauties in other years helps the Joe ease his way through life as they serve to nurture his hunger for girls; but only as eye-candies! Unfortunately, the line up of the senior beauty upgrades from chicks to bombs to bombshells and for the juniors the order is just the reverse.

This was a common start for the three Joes of our battalion and for many more who will be seen commenting on their posts!. Starting with the introduction:

JOE 336 : IMPORTED FROM SOMEWHERE HIGH UP IN THE HIMALAYAS WHILE HE WAS DOING NOTHING.

To call him a “Nerd” would be a mistake because unlike many of his studious kind, the Joe is randomly found searching for girls online or may be admiring the undulating landscapes of some female body. No doubt he is a total disaster to life as the Joe is determined thoroughly towards his career commitments!

JOE 239 : IMPORTED FROM HIS BED WHILE HE WAS BUSY SLEEPING.

“Love at first sight”.. well this a common phenomenon for this Joe and all his life is dedicated to is sleeping and cracking silly jokes, the humour of which brings laughter to none but himself. A total blend of psychic characteristics with bit of brains, this Joe was recently given a demotion in his unit!

JOE 458 : IMPORTED FROM A BAR WHILE HE WAS BUSY THROWING MONEY AT THE POLE DANCERS.

“High stakes in life with no hard work” is a perfect description of JOE 458. Still trying to figure out why he landed into this place, he is a total casanova and all he can spill are the names of the few perfect asses who made their way into our barracks. The Joe recently edged his way through his 5th stage aggradations!

As the Joes toddle their path towards salvation, we bid them luck and loads and loads of beauties!. Enjoy the read!.



4 comments:

  1. well we are still to discover that!

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  2. Its very hard to do this 'Nothing', take my word on that....

    Ahh.... I still wonder how God sculpted those curves so well....and what type of elasticity helps the draperies trace out every curve so closely?

    Maybe someday.....salvation brings me all the answers.

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