Saturday, February 13, 2010

An apology to the ladies

Hug Day’s over and so is the Kiss’ Day. Sorry to have missed out on both? Where had we been? Some of us were cuddled up in beds. We love hugging our quilts on a cold February 12th. Rest of us had nothing good to do, so we made ourselves busy in sorting a list of prospective candidates who qualified our Valentine list prelims. It was not surprising that the list got shorter exponentially. But trust me, each candidature was considered and evaluated with sternness and absolutely unbiased judgments were ratified.
These were days of astounding revelations. We rediscovered that girls come in a myriad of shapes and sizes. I think, we now know what we sought after.
What does it take for a girl to appeal to guy’s eyes? Looks? Definitely, maybe. The perfect blend of right amount of skin on a just enough (thick) layer of fat is all it takes to get noticed. Early civilizations prayed for a perfect inundation. Be it drought or flood, it was a disaster. Same is the case here. Too skinny and you can just slip past through eagle eyes of a hungry flirt. Unnatural protuberances and know the consequences, right? Only a few are born with hands long like those of ‘Kanoon’ (justice) to embrace a Double Decker. Though, a few gentlemen happen to have large hearts to accommodate them, but that’s why they are Gentlemen!
Albeit, this wasn’t the only criteria for scrutiny, but others are just too large to discuss in a small space. Other areas of scutiny sometimes lie in the non-joke area, including having a heavenly hourglass figure and a good height that could put Maria Sharapova in serious jeopardy. Size Zero figures are not always proclaimed attractive, a healthy robust appearance appeals beyond reasoning. Thinking about in a broader sense, that is what men are for. We make sure that women’s beauty does not go unnoticed by the males. However for now, the list is almost complete with minor amendments waiting for approval. Though the list would never get public, feel free to inquire if you made it into it.
Happy Hugging, kissing, promising and a very Happy Valentine to all who found love!
P.S. It has come to our attention that some ladies find the material posted here unfriendly. I, on the behalf of this blog, apologize, if we have unknowingly hurt your tiny hearts. Let me assure you that the subsequent posts would make the remarks more obscure for you to ever find out. We love Peace and Hermione (harmony) and want all ladies to take the content in a jovial sense. We always love cracking puns at the fairer sex, and they are advised to take it in the lighter sense as we are only appreciating their God given inheritance albeit, in a humorous way, as someone said, maybe especially for those with a Y chromosome. And BTW, all incidents we quote here are our personal experiences. So don’t care if you don’t fit and laugh along.


  1. i m nt sorry for sloshed nd bitchy!.. beat that!..

  2. Its OK mate....we had your again.

  3. you are feeling sorry, its more than enough...... otherwise who expects an apology from a gentleman like you.